A RITUAL FOR GRIEF, Perthshire, Scotland

A RITUAL FOR GRIEF

Combining ritual, community, and emotional healing.

WHAT IS A GRIEF RITUAL?

Short answer:

Grief is a natural part of life, but in the modern world we have lost our way with it. Too often we carry it alone. This Grief Ritual offers a sacred, communal space to honour loss, release sorrow, and reconnect with joy. We gather as a community to witness and support one another on this one-day journey.

Grief is a natural response to loss. The more we love and value someone or something, the deeper we feel the loss. Most of us these days have not experienced the power of being supported in ritual, rather than just weeping alone.

“People need to grieve but have no culture in which to really do it” Martín Prechtel

We struggle with all sorts of griefs, big and small – bereavements, broken relationships, lost dreams and hopes, loss of land and place, climate grief, ancestral grief we’re carrying for our forbears, sometimes unbeknownst to us. Life can be hard in all sorts of ways, and often it is our unaddressed grief that sits on top of everything, making us low, numb, and even angry, or just taking the shine off things.

It’s astonishing how much can change in a single day - all you need is a willingness to participate. Here's a comments from a participant ………

……I came away feeling that I had just done something that was very healthy, for me as an individual and for the group that took part, and in some way that I don't understand for the wider world too. An individual and a social healing at the same time.......

The active expression of grief can soften it and move it along. This perspective can feel counterintuitive to us if we have been brought up to view the suppression of emotion as ‘being strong’. Scientific studies are now seeming to show that in shedding tears tears we excrete stress hormones, release mood-boosting hormones, and even relieve emotional and physical pain, all of which serves to restore us to improved physical and mental health.

It’s likely that all cultures have known functional grief practices – and some still retain them. One such are the Dagara people of West Africa, whose elders sent the gifted teacher, Dr Malidoma Somé, to share their indigenous knowledge as a healing gift for us modern folk.

This profound Grief Ritual works not only on the level of psychological and emotional need, but also engages deeply with the world of Spirit – the flow of natural energies of which we are a part. This gives it profound healing power beyond the mundane. The effects can flow beyond us as individuals, as we honour our ancestors and help to put old ghosts to rest. By bringing us into greater harmony and balance, and restoring connection and flow within our ancestral lines, it brings healing to our whole world.

For more information about logistics or payments please contact John at freegull@hotmail.co.uk

For more information about the ritual please contact John at freegull@hotmail.co.uk Kathryn at kathrynedwards50@gmail.com

TICKETS

We offer a sliding scale of ticket prices.

Early Bird discount if you buy a ticket no later than 16th May £95

Standard fee from 17th of May: £120

Supporter for those able to offer a little extra to support others: £140

Ritual drummer: Competent drummers if they drum in the ritual, get a discount. £60 Limited offer. Contact John to discuss

Concession: a limited number of tickets for those in circumstances needing a discount or stage payments. Contact John to discuss

CLICK RIGHT HAND TICKET PANEL TO BOOK. _ EARLY BIRDS _

Some more detailed information

How the day looks

We offer a day of intense healing for broken hearts and bruised spirits. A day spent in the company of others, where you can grieve as part of a community, supporting and being supported. We begin the day by considering the nature of grief and sharing experiences, before creating a physical, ritual space for grief to flow. It is amazing how quickly this ritual space comes together; some ancient and wise part of us knows just what to do.

Once the ritual starts, everyone is invited, through song and dance, tears and their own personal forms of expression, to offer up whatever is weighing them down. This activity has a natural flow and we find our body knows how to grieve. When done communally this process is not so overwhelming.

........I liked that we made the shrines, which made the space ours. The concept of the village and the welcome each participant got on their return was lovely...........Everything about it was presented clearly. There was nothing that I didn’t like about the day…………I was amazed watching strangers physically change into a community through singing, drumming, dancing, doing ritual together. Incredible in such a short space of time..........It was a positive experience and will be long remembered as a highlight of the year..........Had a huge internal shift and increased feeling of supportive connection with some ancestors…..

This ritual draws on the cathartic funeral practices of the Dagara people in Burkina Faso, West Africa. It was crafted by Dr Malidoma Somé of the Dagara tribe as a direct response to the burdens of grief that he saw were crushing those of us living in modernity.

‘Grief takes us to the top of the hill and then lets us walk back down slowly, peacefully. It helps relieve the person who is in sorrow and leads them towards acceptance of the phenomenon of death, separation and love.’ (Malidoma Somé, Dagara Elder).

Note : We tithe our income from our Grief Rituals to contribute to wellbeing projects in Burkina Faso in gratitude for the gift of this medicine.

OUR RITUAL FACILITATORS:

KATHRYN EDWARDS had a life-changing encounter with Dr Malidoma Somé when she learned – experientially – how ritual creates and sustains community. She studied Dagara wisdom, including the theory and practice of ritual, with Malidoma for two decades in the US and in Europe. Kathryn was frequently invited to visit his village in Burkina Faso, West Africa, and eventually acted as co-tour-manager for Western study groups there.

Kathryn was particularly inspired by the beauty and healing effects of Dagara funerals. Her spontaneous childhood practice had been to bury dead birds in a shoebox with pomp and flowers, so becoming a funeral celebrant for humans was a natural progression. She apprenticed herself to a progressive undertaker, to be better informed about the care of the dead. She went to weep at Malidoma’s own funeral in Burkina Faso in 2022.

Kathryn believes that working with ritual technology will fortify us, as modernity unravels in the face of the climate emergency. kathrynedwards50@gmail.com

JOHN SCAIFE has studied and practised extensively with the Dagara teachers Malidoma and Sobonfu Somé in the UK, and also with Martin Prechtel in the UK and at his ‘Bolad’s Kitchen’ school in New Mexico, having been introduced to them by poet and ‘men’s movement’ leaders, poet Robert Bly and mythologist Michael Meade, in the 1990s. During this time he also learnt from James Hillman and Robert Moore. He is an experienced ritualist (especially rites of passage for men and women, and in grief work), a cowrie-shell diviner and accomplished storyteller.

John grew up in Northumberland. He regularly returns to run his favourite beach and walk the Cheviots. He now lives in Sussex. www.recastpath.life

NEED TO KNOW MORE, STILL UNCERTAIN ?

To read more about grief and grief rituals visit our sister website www.ritualsforgrief/org

FOR MORE INFORMATION please send an email to freegull@hotmail.co.uk